Recovering from Bipolar type I – THERESE | MISTAG

Sometimes I find it to be funny, Hum I deal with it it doesn’t bother me no, I can deal with it I turn it to a joke, you know. I already asked to my psychiatrist “I think I am crazy”, he said no, you are far from crazy you know, when he said it it felt nice because I know that during the beginning of the illness I really thought that I was completely crazy, but when I asked, he said “oh, no, you are far from crazy.” About my my experience hum, with mental health, it has been a process and if I did not go through it, through hum, all this process I would not be the person I am today. You know, it allowed me to grow, to be a different person than what I was before. I would not even come back to that time, even before I get a diagnostic, even before my illness, I would not go back there. Not in this life, this is another life, it is in the past. Today it is a new life. The symptoms are to feel great, to be close to be close to how could I say it, hum, to be close to god, it is hum, it is something hum, it’s like if I was on a cloud but not to high and it is not down neither it is like like, a gymnast on a string, who hum, who has its balance and who doesn’t fall, but who needs to balance from one side to another to get its balance. This is the example I would give. When I go to sleep I don’t how I will be the next morning. When I wake up I am very happy and my struggles are to be busy, to find things for my wellness, things that I like, to find places, to do things for my wellness that I love and hum, it is an everyday work I plan my days in advance and I have an agenda for all of my days sometimes I am full for 2 months and hum, that’s it. Fear hum… I don’t have big fears I already got some fears that are okay but the fear hum sometimes I am maybe afraid of hum to have another psychotic episode a big one that I can’t come back from but I would be surprised.. Not today Not today but hum, fearing the dark … Not anymore No, maybe I fear death a bit but no… No. I don’t have many fears no. My hobbies are to do a lot of creative things create things, going to the Quebec Art Museum once a month to create things with children, but I do like the children there’s a teacher and he gives a workshop once a month Out of it I go to an organism called Osmose whe I do some art and wellness or creative art and I am the animator there also sometimes There’s another place where I also go called Pêche, which is also an organism for mental health where I from “La commission Scholaire” and I go to classes there in 2D, 3D art yes I mostly do creative art. I hike too, I travel, mostly it, but I create a lot, I like to create. I remember (my god), once I had a psychotic episode and it’s funny but it wasn’t funny but I find it funny, I was going to “les plaines” ( a place in Quebec City) to leave in a OVNI vessel but hum I found it funny afterwards, it’s hum, to act like this and think this will come and land hum, anyway, I don’t know if I missed my flight but I came back (laugh) Hum, I would like to know people I have friends, I have a great social network I have friends, I have my daughter also, we go out together we are like friends but hum, I would like to know people who are not related to mental health to talk with people without any problems but they are very rare nowadays many people have it but yes to talk about anything but hum, I have people to talk about some stuff that are open but yes that’s it. That you can get out of it, you can recover but you need to take your time. When you want to go too fast sometimes in this process well sometimes you get lost you need to take the time to process and to listen to your doctor and mostly to take your medicine because I was for a while without taking medicine and it was going up and down, but after a while when you move forward and process, things calm down, and after a while you have less and less the need of medication but still there are some medications that you need to take to be more balanced, but you can recover and yes me it’s been hum, my god, it’s been 18 years at least 19 years that I haven’t been hospitalized once I was closed but I know my own symptoms and I don’t wait I don’t wait anymore so it’s going great since 2012. About me, nothing, it’s mostly about others that it bothers me. Like I bother my daughter sometimes sometimes, I look at her and joke about the weight, but if someone else says something.. Me I say it she knows I’m joking but I know coming from someone she doesn’t know it won’t be a joke, I’ll know it directly and so hum, I go to the person and I am very direct. Mostly that the process is a life’s process and it is like a a process from childhood to adolescence and from adolescence to adulthood and from adulthood to being old you’ll learn all your life and even after that we will continue to learn and not ot give up never give up, there’s always something beautiful and it doesn’t mean it will happen when you’re 20, it can happen at 20, 30, 40, 50, to me it happened when I was 51 that I got out of it, to say it this way but hum, you just need to wait and this moment will happen, just don’t give up you need to trust life and you need to believe it has some great plans for you.

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