Body Dysphoria || Fridays with Ollie~


Hey Everyone! Welcome back to scotTRANS and
this week, we’re talking about Body Dysphoria~ [INTRO MUSIC] For all our loyal subscribers, you will notice that I have changed location again..
I feel like I say this like every video.. I’m back in Nottingham after being at uni
for a while.. What is this? Hair, what are you doing??
Also, my filming day marks my 1 week on Testosterone! Woop woop woop woop~
So, I think the topic this week; Body Dysphoria will be a bit of a tough one to talk about..
I dunno.. Like, it’s like a weeks worth of videos talking
about what we don’t like about our bodies, so if you’re not feeling too great or not
wanting to talk about dysphoria, or stuff like that, erm, I’d suggest watching this
video another time or just skipping this week’s videos.. I just want to make sure that I don’t
make you feel rubbish.. I said in last week’s video that I was gonna
get a new camera.. Not got that yet. Hopefully for future videos, you’ll be able to hear
me a bit better coz I’ll have a microphone for my camera and all that stuff..
I don’t think I’ll talk about all the things that I feel dysphoric about because that’s
a bit heavy, but I’ll talk about a few things that I feel okay talking about at the moment.
One of the things that I feel most dyphoric about is my voice and also my chest. My voice
is mainly a problem because.. I think I talked about it in the last video. If people happen to
gender me correctly, and then I speak, then they’ll misgender me or they’ll apologize
for gendering me correctly, which is a bit weird.. But it happens quite a lot actually.
Yeh, my chest is my area of most dysphoria I think.. err I wear a binder pretty much
every day, even round the house.. like I’m wearing one today.. i love this one by the
way, mainly coz it’s skin colored, so when I first put it on and like I caught myself
in the mirror, basically, it just looked like I had a flat chest coz it didn’t look like
I had a binder on and that was pretty kool~ I don’t have a particularly large chest, but
it’s still a lot more prominent than like a cis male chest, so.. yeh, I wear a GC2B
binder and that seems to get rid of most of my dysphoria for that, but obviously not all
of it because it doesn’t make it completely flat, so I’m always kind of a bit on alert
to make sure that my tshirt is kind of hanging right and stuff.. I find that these tshirts-
I’ve forgotten the name of them, but the ones that have the like kind of shoulder, off the
shoulder?? I sew things.. I should probably know the
technical terms- when they have the seam that’s not quite on the shoulder, it makes your chest
look a bit flatter and it also kind of broadens your shoulders. So, yeh, I often wear tshirts
that have this bit. I think pretty much most of the rest of my
dysphoria is kind of like where body fat sits. I mean, I don’t have a particularly curvy
figure, but it’s more curvy than I’d like it to be. I’m not a massive fan of my thighs,
mainly because it kind of accentuates my hips and stuff..
I don’t particularly want that. And, then like with where fat sits, then that also includes
my face. But, like, T is gonna change that, so I’m trying to not focus on stuff like that
at the moment coz it’s like in the process of changing.
A weird one is I get like hair dysphoria.. I don’t know if other people get this or not..
I don’t know.. I have quite a feminine hair line, like it’s very round and I don’t like
that.. So, if i’m feeling super dysphoric, I’ll go and get a hair cut or get it dyed
or something to change the way that I feel about it. It also really helps that the hairdresser
that I go to is like super trans-inclusive and I think quite a lot of her customers are
trans people, mainly coz she’s just like so accepting and nice.. Thanks, Savannah~

3 comments

  1. Definitely can relate to the height point, being almost 6'2 and trans is definitely a struggle haha, always difficult finding clothes I like at my height

  2. This is getting weird… I'm also 5ft2 😅 And those tops are raglan shirts, they work so good at making shoulders stand out more and like distracting peoples eyes away from other areas? 😄 good video Ollie!

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